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tiptoe out the back
Nov. 20th, 2014 12:17 amSo we are indeed three for three on losing a parental type figure in as many winters. Drew's dad passed on early this afternoon.
I'm in a weird place with this one. I can't say I was very close to my father in law, but then again he wasn't the sort you get close to, if you know what I mean. He was always sort of politely aloof, except when he unexpectedly wasn't, which honestly was usually after a couple of grown-up beverages of some sort - then he was actually surprisingly funny in a way that tended to thoroughly embarrass Drew. But I don't know, this loss feels muted somehow, especially in contrast to the last two, but I suppose anything would seem real quite compared to an Irish wake and a West Indian Q funeral.
People keep asking me how Drew is, mostly because he takes to other people fussing over/at him about as well as a porcupine takes to being repeatedly poked in the butt. I've been flippantly answering "oh he's... stubborn." That's about the long and short of it, really. He wrote a really interesting and eloquent essay on his state of mind upon receiving the news earlier - it's over nyah. (Insert selfish grumble grump arg about the general decline of Livejournal - I miss reading this level of writing from him on the regular because he's really good with the word type things.) It's a good window into his state of mind.
I can't say I can entirely wrap my head around this sort of "go quietly into the night, leave behind no trace of your passing and let only the wind speak your name" method of departing this life. I suppose it never really matters to the one leaving whether you're remembered or memorialized or what have you after the fact, which is I suppose why they say funerals are for the living. As for the living in this case, there will be some sort of memorial service of some type held after the holidays, but until then, a quiet departure, no fuss, no disruption and life will go on in the morning per usual. Sans one.
I'm in a weird place with this one. I can't say I was very close to my father in law, but then again he wasn't the sort you get close to, if you know what I mean. He was always sort of politely aloof, except when he unexpectedly wasn't, which honestly was usually after a couple of grown-up beverages of some sort - then he was actually surprisingly funny in a way that tended to thoroughly embarrass Drew. But I don't know, this loss feels muted somehow, especially in contrast to the last two, but I suppose anything would seem real quite compared to an Irish wake and a West Indian Q funeral.
People keep asking me how Drew is, mostly because he takes to other people fussing over/at him about as well as a porcupine takes to being repeatedly poked in the butt. I've been flippantly answering "oh he's... stubborn." That's about the long and short of it, really. He wrote a really interesting and eloquent essay on his state of mind upon receiving the news earlier - it's over nyah. (Insert selfish grumble grump arg about the general decline of Livejournal - I miss reading this level of writing from him on the regular because he's really good with the word type things.) It's a good window into his state of mind.
I can't say I can entirely wrap my head around this sort of "go quietly into the night, leave behind no trace of your passing and let only the wind speak your name" method of departing this life. I suppose it never really matters to the one leaving whether you're remembered or memorialized or what have you after the fact, which is I suppose why they say funerals are for the living. As for the living in this case, there will be some sort of memorial service of some type held after the holidays, but until then, a quiet departure, no fuss, no disruption and life will go on in the morning per usual. Sans one.
