anagram of brat

stolen from cora (by way of jo ) cause I love me a questionnaire (I wonder if somewhere on DW someone's still doing Friday Five?):

Is there an interesting story behind your username?

My actual initials are ARBT. The interesting part of the story is that I decided on this username before I legally acquired the T, and it's in fact the ONLY reason why I hyphenated my last name when I married Husbeast. He was actually baffled that I wanted to take his at all.

And anyone that knows me understands that "brat" is and always was a large chunk of my identity.

Location and language(s):

The "Here be dragons" end of Massachusetts (Northeastern USA), which amuses me because clearly the dragons in question are college students, supercilious academics, queer people of all descriptions (yay!) and cows.

English is my language, though I used to be near fluent in French, conversational in Russian and knew enough Spanish to be reasonably functional thanks to a Tejana sister-in-law and bilingual signage all over NY.


Age range (e.g 20s, 30s, etc.):

I turn 45 in October. I'm in that murky generational transition period often referred to as "Xennial" -- basically the rapid transition from analog to digital and the explosion of personal computer tech corresponds directly to how long I've been alive. Even though I'm a hair older than the oldest of the "geriatric millennials" (lololol) I have much more in common with them than to true Xers.

Hot button/deal breaker issues that will likely lead to unfriending:

I'm a polyamorous bi/pan Black AFAB who is gender- and -neurospicy and fiercely leftist. Like truly liberal not the light conservative that passes for liberal in these united states. "Woke," if you will. I don't really believe in organized religion but as long as adopting an us vs them mentality and manipulating others into joining your faith is not a major part of your practice I'm absolutely chill with you. I like to refer to myself as a lapsed pagan, lol. I believe in compassion, dignity and human rights for everyone regardless of whether I agree with your life choices or not, and I'm a strong advocate of examining one's complicity in the white supremicist kyriarchy we all find ourselves living under.

If any of that bugs you, I invite you to maybe reflect on why, but I'm not interested in defending or debating any of the above.

Oh and get your goddamn vaccines, damn it.


Do you have an "About Me" post new friends can read to get a sense of who you are, the people you talk about regularly, etc.?

I don't think I've written one in about a decade? its been a bit since I felt the necessity, as I had stopped writing here and migrated to other socials in the mid to late 10s like a lot of people. Hence this post.

Is your profile up-to-date or at all useful?

um... good question? lemme look...

....well, aside from the fact that my fucking ICQ number is still listed (is that even a thing anymore?) yeah, it's still accurate. Guess keeping it short and simple was the pro move. But really these days if you're looking for me, just search for this handle. I haven't changed my online branding since 2012 and considering it's attached to a few still ongoing side hustles, it's not going away.

I do feel a little sad about the circle of names from both here and Livejournal that are long defunct though, which is 90% of them.

List a few things you think it's important new friends know about you right away:

I swear like a drunken dockworker but I'm really very nice and funny, I promise. And I only bite with enthusiastic consent.

Oh! that's a thing. I am sex and sex-worker positive and fierce about it. Not quite a dealbreaker, but don't get SWERFY about it.

You mostly write about:

Day to day stuff, my mental health, how I'm doing, people I love/interact with, things I think about, music I'm participating in or listening to, cats. I don't think I get mad political but that's because my entire existence is political and not easily extricated. Make of that what you will.

You never or very rarely write about:

Listen there is sooooooooooooo much word vomit potential in this brain, I'm not ruling out any topics.

Is your journal mostly public, locked, or a mix of public and locked?

This journal is mostly friends only except for a few introductory entries. I'm not super concerned about my privacy but I prefer generally having an idea who knows about how deep the neurodivergent rabbit hole is lol

Do you use filters for certain types of posts (e.g. fandom-related posts, or posts about sex, or mental health issues, etc.)?

Not really anymore? I have... other journals... for seriously explicit stuff (though I haven't used them in a bit). I'll try to be a bit better about content warning/tagging/entry cutting for the spicier stuff though, but I've never had a concern.

Your posting frequency (e.g. daily, every few days, weekly, etc.):

Of late (*cough* read since the Brain Asplode of February 2023 *cough*) its been more or less weekly, which a slow ramp up from nearly never. I'm aiming for at least once every 2-3 days.

Does your journal frequently include any of the following: memes, linkspams, gifs, photos, videos, etc?

in the old days it did. But these days I have tumblr and insta for memes and photos and links and videos go on Facebook. I do occasionally crosspost images/gifs here if they are relevant to the entry in question

What do you enjoy most about journaling?

I love blathering about what all is going on in my head, and I've gotten to the point of my life where almost no one asks anymore which apparently does a severe number on my self-esteem. Also while it was okay before it got all about the Al Gore Rhythm, short form social media was just easier because i could fire off a quick thought and move on, but things are so based on Gaining Engagement now, and I feel like true connection via other SM platforms is getting lost. One of the things I mourn with the death of LJ and other long form social media is the complete lack of any sense of... intimacy? it's all very surface and superficial and curated; no one gets really open and raw and REAL anymore. I'm not interested in perfection, I wanna see your mess so I can feel better about mine!

How often do you read your friends list (e.g. daily, every other day, once a week, etc.)?

I read daily. The days of five minute refresh are over, alas, but I do read every entry.

You really enjoy reading about:

Other people's lives. What they care about. What they're scared of. What cute thing their kids or friends or significant other did they felt was worth noting. How That Coworker annoyed them today. Having to go through Scary Medical Procedures. What Silly Stuff on the Internet caught people's attention. Really just anything, I love hearing about all of it.

You have very little interest in reading about:

uhhh, well provided you aren't a total clueless bigot, I don't think anything is off the table? I will probably skip over anything Harry Potter related though. Not that I don't like the books themselves, but I don't believe in lining JK Rowling's pockets while she throws her HP funded and fuelled platform behind invalidating trans people. Which sucks, because I was an avowed Puffle before she decided to fully show her entire ass.

Your thoughts on journals that regularly include any of the following: memes, linkspams, gifs, photos, videos, etc?

I don't mind them. These days I'd probably just be surprised to see any of that stuff here, if you know what I mean.

When it comes to comments on your posts, what matters more -- quality or quantity?

I don't care, honestly. I like knowing I'm not entirely shouting into an unresponsive void, but I'm also not going to be butthurt if you only comment when the spirit strikes you.

Do you unfriend people who don't comment much, even if you know they are reading you regularly?

What? No! The fuck? That's dumb.

What is your approach when it comes to commenting on other journals?

If I have a particular need to respond to or validate something I read, I will. If I don't, I won't. cora did say something in her answe about missing the simplicity of a like button but also being glad dreamwidth doesn't have one because it forces you to think a little bit more about engaging with content a bit more than simply doubletapping.

When you friend someone, but things don't really click, do you unfriend them without warning, or do you send them a note first? How do you prefer to be unfriended in similar circumstances?

...yeah, unless I know you in real life or long enough that we can properly be considered friends, I'm not super pressed if you show yourself the door without explanation, and vice versa. If there's already an established relationship at play anything that would warrant unfriending would generally also warrant an Actual Off-Journal conversation.

Friending memes often ask people to list their favourite TV shows, movies, books, etc., but more often than not, those aren't things people actually write about in their journal. Do you have any favourite TV shows, movies, books, etc., that you DO often write about -- not necessarily in a fandom sort of way, just in general?

That I write about regularly? not that I can think of. I may mention in passing media I consume and like in my entries and once in a while a particular thing with still that it gets mentioned repeatedly (I think right now the only media that would qualify would be Our Flag Means Death... SEASON 2 WHEN, HBO???) but the thing about having a very widely scattered and diverse set of interests and tastes is that my attention is held by different things at different times and the landscape is always shifting.


Any final thoughts you'd like to share with potential new friends?

To borrow an idea from a recent bit of writing: "Welcome to the Brat Existential Crisis. Please ensure your safety harness is fully in the down and locked position. Please keep all arms and legs inside the car at all times. In case of emergency the exits are here, here, here, here, here, here anywhere, and thank you for riding. Enjoy your trip!"

friending meme.|one of a different sort| THIS WAY

( Now with like, actual formatting and stuff! )

Need to do a catchup post at some point, but right now all I want is a hot shower and bed.

This segment took a few days because I disliked most of the questions. :P That's the problem with the big questionnaires, sometimes it's obvious they were written by high schoolers, lol

( cut to spare your friends lists )

The realities of modern life: how is it I could essentially sit on my ass all day in front of a terminal and yet come home drop dead exhausted at the end of the day? Some vague ancestral spectre in my head is confused as to how I can be tired after essentially doing nothing all day. Little does it know of computer witchery and its demands upon the psyche.

In light of some conversational points touched on by grinninfoole, on another level of my brain I spent the day poking some old wounds to test if they, in fact, still hurt or whether I was holding on to a memory of pain rather than actually experiencing it, and if the hurt was still there, why. Ended up spending my lunch hour scarfing the remains of the chicken and root veggie bake I made last night and jotting down a list. I would say that 90% of things poked still legit hurt, but it was more of a twinge or a sore, rather than an OW and in a lot of cases, it pointed to some issues within my own brain wiring that need consideration and work still. Others don't hurt anymore, but I can't forgive their infliction. Overall it was a decent exercise: clarified some things in my head and kept my brain from entirely melting today. There may be a filtered post about it at some point, or it may be one for the Silence*, or I may just put everything back away until the need for omphaloskepsis rises again. Unsure as yet.

Speaking of pointless omphaloskepsis, MORE ULTIMATE DESTINY APOCALYPSE INANE QUESTIONS!

( 301-400 )

All right, I'm awake, less tipsy and have a yawning empty void of a Sunday, lets at least finish the first 200 questions. Also HI NEW FIEND. Not a typo.

( cut to protect the guilty )

Whew! Well that's quite enough of that for a bit. I have stuff to do and I've wasted HOURS on this already hahaha.

I feel a little silly doing this because there's an entire month left in 2012, but it's already making the rounds so nyeh.

( end of year meme )

Also regarding today:

We met eight years ago, when your oldest was still discovering her toes. Four years later, when both of our lives were rapidly unravelling, we somehow decided weathering those particular storms together was a better idea than dealing with them separately. This year we threw a party and got rings and stuff. 32 years ago, though, you were born, making all this possible.

My icon says "sail away with me." These days I'm confused as to whether the ninja sailed away with the pirate, or the pirate is chasing the ninja across the rooftops of Tortuga swearing and brandishing an empty rum bottle in a fit of pique. Either way, every year has been an adventure, and I don't think I ever want to get off this ride.

Happy birthday, my love, my darling, my cell23.

Guess what time of year it is, folks.



yep. That time.

March 2011: Living in Sunderland, in Nerdclave 1 (also known as Squire) with cell23, Lily the cat, two kids every other week, piecing my brain and my life together with varying levels of success.

March 2001: Still living in Fisher Price My First Apartment in the ass end of Northampton, and just landed my first two post college jobs. One of which I'm still at. Also sort of in a period of transition and reconstruction, actually. I seem to have those once every decade or so.

March 1991: The end of seventh grade and very much in the throes of adolescent angst and insanity. Erm, shit, what was I up to then? Writing a lot. Mooning over harinezumi probably. Listening to a lot of hip-hop 'cause it was still fun back then. Wearing a lot of florescent because it looked good on me. Ohh, getting the chicken pox again! good times. Not. Oh hey, saying "Not!" was popular then too.

March 1981: Shit if I remember, I wasn't quite three yet. I only remember a handful of things from that year. Learning to read, conceptualizing that there were people being born that were younger than I was (in this case one of my cousins) and this being an astounding concept for me, remembering riding the subway and thinking that was a Very Big Adventure. Visiting Ruthy at college. Little flashes here and there, but nothing truly concrete.

March 1971: Not even a twinkle in anyone's eye yet.

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Best:
I'm very good in a crisis. Generally shit hits the fan and my brain goes into overdrive, my wibbly jello core hardens into cold determined steel, and usually I can have whatever problem has come up solved or handled if not immediately, within a few minutes. It feels a bit like hitting a star in Super Mario - I briefly become impervious to all things that would squick, rattle, unnerve or otherwise freak me out. It usually comes at a very high cost though - generally after crisis is managed I have to go away and recharge my spoons for a while.

Also, I am easily amused. Yeah, when people tell me that it's usually pejorative, but it's true. I can literally find some way to entertain myself or have fun/interest in just about any situation. This makes me really good to have adventures/watch obscure series/anime with or get me to read a book.

Worst:
I have no focus or really much ambition/drive to do anything with myself. This is frustrating. I'm also kinda lazy and tend to procrastinate on everything. A lot. I also hold terrible, hate and vitriol filled grudges.

Would my friends agree?
Yeah probably.



LAST CHANCE TO LOVE ME!

I'm mostly just posting to kill time until midnight, when I plan to go hunting for this year's Valentine eggs. Yes I'm a dork and obsessed. Bite me.

Today was kinda rough for a few reasons, but mostly because Little Beast was having another day of not feeling well. This manifested in the second worst tantrum I'd ever seen him throw. Half an hour of piercing "SOMEONE IS CLEARLY MURDERING ME CALL THE AMPERLAMPS" level screaming all sparked off because he did not want his clothes changed, and then when we got to the Chiasson's today, he was wobbly and listless and cranky and fevery and then right before he left (thank heavens we hadn't made it to the car yet) his breakfast and lunch made a violent reappearance, so we ended up staying there to wash his clothes and coat up. Oyyy. Poor little guy. He spent a good portion of today curled up in a sleepy daze on various laps. I hope his tummy feels better soon.

KITTY! cell23 and I returned with trepidation after leaving Lily in the house alone all day, but apparently she'd just spent a quiet afternoon sleeping under various beds. We've been playing with her all evening to make up with that, she is ridiculous when after toy mice or anything with tails. Plus the usual lulz of cat unable to brake on linoleum floor. She is currently curled up asleep near cell23's feet... who, in the rare instance of him collapsing into bed before me, is also pretty much passed out. My bedroom is full of cute right now. AND WE HAS A KITTY. EEEEEEEEEE. Not going to lie, she seems to have settled on cell23 as her designated hoo-mon and mostly only shows an interest in me when she wants to play or shove her entire face in my dinner bowl (yes she did that) but I'm rather well used to that, and she seems more than willing to play when I offer, so it's cool... and it's nice having a cat around again. I didn't realize exactly how much I missed living with the bitsy assholes. :)

Gotta get my Valentine dragon-snagging on in a few. 'Night LJ.

ETA: Mission accomplished! Love my dragons?



And Kidzillas, too:

I promise to send something handmade to the first 5 people who leave a comment here. They in turn must post this statement and send something they make to the first 5 people who comment on their blog post.

The only other rules are that:

1) it must be handmade by you and,

2) it must be sent to your 5 people sometime within 2011.


I like this meme. Besides, maybe it'll get me crafting shit again. *makes MMO crafting hands*