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Home today, but instead of staring into the pixels and panicking about everything I'm taking advantage of that fire under my ass feeling and chipping away and the mountain of sheer shit that needs shoveling. Unfortunately speaking of shit, the insides are acting up again, so I'm rather glad I didn't brave the office.
Brain is jangled as well. I'm being chased by that feeling that I'm barely outrunning an anvil that really really wants to drop on my head. Or considering how I picture this, I'm Mario and my life is some kind of heat-seaking Thwomp. Reminds me of a macro I made ages ago actually...
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In good news, things have settled back to some semblance of normalcy in the Boobyhaven so I no longer have to stress about at home drama... which frees me up quite beautifully for stressing about everything else drama, whoohoo. *sigh* I would really really really like the option of getting out of my day to day survival mode of thinking and be in a place where I can start thinking about some long term plans. I think if I managed to think in terms of that, I'd get more overall done because I'd be able to do things in increments instead of trying to fit everything that possibly needs doing into my infrequent productivity splodes. But I have a basic nebulous idea as to where I want to be in a couple of years lifewise, and it would be really nice if I could start laying the groundwork for how to get there instead of freaking out about everything undone right now. Ugh. Planning is not my strong suit, dealing with immediate crises is. However that's not exactly a stress-free mode of existence.
I also need to continue the trend of slicing out the Excess Noise in my life. Mostly letting go of people that aren't... conducive to my peace of mind. If the lenten experiment in drastically reducing Facebook and IM/Yahoo time is any indication, the drama factor indeed goes way down when I have less Other People Noise blipping at me. May be time to cull the herd again.
Back to riding the productivity train again. Least until I get kicked off.
Brain is jangled as well. I'm being chased by that feeling that I'm barely outrunning an anvil that really really wants to drop on my head. Or considering how I picture this, I'm Mario and my life is some kind of heat-seaking Thwomp. Reminds me of a macro I made ages ago actually...
.In good news, things have settled back to some semblance of normalcy in the Boobyhaven so I no longer have to stress about at home drama... which frees me up quite beautifully for stressing about everything else drama, whoohoo. *sigh* I would really really really like the option of getting out of my day to day survival mode of thinking and be in a place where I can start thinking about some long term plans. I think if I managed to think in terms of that, I'd get more overall done because I'd be able to do things in increments instead of trying to fit everything that possibly needs doing into my infrequent productivity splodes. But I have a basic nebulous idea as to where I want to be in a couple of years lifewise, and it would be really nice if I could start laying the groundwork for how to get there instead of freaking out about everything undone right now. Ugh. Planning is not my strong suit, dealing with immediate crises is. However that's not exactly a stress-free mode of existence.
I also need to continue the trend of slicing out the Excess Noise in my life. Mostly letting go of people that aren't... conducive to my peace of mind. If the lenten experiment in drastically reducing Facebook and IM/Yahoo time is any indication, the drama factor indeed goes way down when I have less Other People Noise blipping at me. May be time to cull the herd again.
Back to riding the productivity train again. Least until I get kicked off.
