![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Writer's Block: Critical mass
Apr. 8th, 2010 10:12 am[Error: unknown template qotd]
Not very well generally. While I can put on the face of listening objectively, parts of me are taking whatever's being said deeply personally and thinking the other person's making judgments on my ability, intelligence or existence. Now (usually) I can shut the super-sensitive voices up enough to actually hear the criticism as its being given and save the freaking out until later, which is enormous progress. Also if its something I know deep down is true, I will eventually accept what is said, and thank/apologize to the person who cared enough to give it. (It might take months/years, but it does happen.)
Also depends on the source. I'm far more likely to take criticism from certain people than others. Generally if I feel no need to impress you in the first place, you can criticize me all you like and I won't take it as a personal attack. People I don't know well, people I feel somehow at a disadvantage with, people I'm paranoid about looking stupid in front of, criticism is likely to find me crying in the shower later that night.
I am far more critical of myself publicly. Generally it will take pissing me off to the extreme to be outwardly critical of someone else, even when they need it; something else I'm working on, getting past that whole "if you ain't got something nice to say..." mentality. I recently read a far better model regarding things that should be said to others - is it kind? is it necessary? is it true? and if it doesn't meet 2 of the three criteria it doesn't need to be said.
Not very well generally. While I can put on the face of listening objectively, parts of me are taking whatever's being said deeply personally and thinking the other person's making judgments on my ability, intelligence or existence. Now (usually) I can shut the super-sensitive voices up enough to actually hear the criticism as its being given and save the freaking out until later, which is enormous progress. Also if its something I know deep down is true, I will eventually accept what is said, and thank/apologize to the person who cared enough to give it. (It might take months/years, but it does happen.)
Also depends on the source. I'm far more likely to take criticism from certain people than others. Generally if I feel no need to impress you in the first place, you can criticize me all you like and I won't take it as a personal attack. People I don't know well, people I feel somehow at a disadvantage with, people I'm paranoid about looking stupid in front of, criticism is likely to find me crying in the shower later that night.
I am far more critical of myself publicly. Generally it will take pissing me off to the extreme to be outwardly critical of someone else, even when they need it; something else I'm working on, getting past that whole "if you ain't got something nice to say..." mentality. I recently read a far better model regarding things that should be said to others - is it kind? is it necessary? is it true? and if it doesn't meet 2 of the three criteria it doesn't need to be said.
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif){kind=small}
