anagram of brat

So this afternoon, when I attempted to shake parmesan onto my lunch, the can made a rather alarming KACHUNK noise. Not something you expect out of your sprinky cheese. I set the can down, unscrewed the lid, and...

Apparently we have to talk to the kids about not leaving pencils in the parmesan now? O_o

A photo posted by ARBT (@anagramofbrat) on Dec 17, 2013 at 11:46am PST

...the HELL?

The pencil could not have gotten in there by accident - someone (we suspect Beastie) had to open the fridge, get out the cheese, unscrew the top, drop in the pencil, screw the top back on, put the cheese back, and close the fridge.

I ain't even mad, just incredibly confused. I'm thinking something like the following went down: Beastie wanted to annoy Kidzilla, so he took her pencil while she was doing homework, put it in the cheese, and probably gloated to her that he hid it where she would NEVER find it. But I don't think I'm ever going to find out for sure; chances are by the time I see them next they'll have forgotten it happened at all, let alone WHY.

*sigh* Kids, y'all.

...there really are not enough ellipses for this.

This morning I had not 1 but 2 dreams about 30 Rock. The first one was that somehow one of the sisters had managed to get me, a couple of her friends, and herself a private tour of some of the sets, so were all hanging out sitting on Kenneth's desk (and oddly/appropriately enough wearing NBC page jackets) watching people bustle around elsewhere when Alec Baldwin comes by looking all Jack Donaghy dapper to chat with us, take pictures and just be all "yes yes, I'm a celebrity, I don't know you people, but I'm gonna be nice to you for five minutes." While he was at it, Dean Winters for some reason was passing through out of costume and makeup, so I had a crazy fangirl moment ("OMG! I loved you in OZ! And in all those Allstate ads! You do douchebags really well!") and he was really really nice about that, lol. And then Tina Fey showed up, appropriately cute and super pregnant (which she actually is right now - I guess the ep of SNL the other day saw fit to remind me of that), and we talked about comedy and what it was like working with various actors (Tracey Morgan neither came up in conversation or showed up in the dream, so no opportunity to punch him in the kidney transplant. Sorry.) I also asked if I could pose in Jack's office with Alec Baldwin wearing a tux and holding a scotch; while the idea made her laugh she said it wouldn't be a good idea due to network and copyright. Eh worth a try anyway right?

I woke up and was all like huh? remarked on it on Twitter, went back to sleep and the dream continued with watching the cast film scenes from an upcoming episode of the "Liz Lemon thinks she's losing her mind; mayhem ensues" variety, woke up for real and was all WTF.

Probably some combination of watching the opening of SNL last saturday (it was a rerun), wibbling about going to New York today, and other stuff going that cooked that up in my subconscious, but... really?

Anyway, must continue running about like a headless chicken and packing. Catch you guys on the flip.

Safe for work (and the sound ain't necessary), but probably not safe for the cohesion of your brain.

There is nothing shocking or offensive or horrible about this video like my usual "if I must suffer" or "no comment" youtube posts. My problem is that it's so... fucking... stupid. Like seriously, they need to fire the lyricist. Whoever they are has no sense of rhythm, meter or meaningful content and then they made this poor girl sing it into a vocoder. WHAT THE FUCK BRAINSPLODE.

Which sucks cause the song itself is fucking catchy and is now firmly stuck in my head. GRRR ARGH. I kinda just want the backing instrumental so I can superimpose a whole other vocal track on top of it. Or better yet gangsta rap a la Girl Talk. But as is? AAAAAAAAAGH DELIVER ME FROM AUTOTUNED TEENAGE HELL.

Aside from contending with this aural dreck, I'm splitting my time between Buffy, work, fighting with Bryce 5 and some tomb terrain and hunting for new eggs on Dragcave. How's your day been so far?

In a quiet spell between SVU episodes and no music on, I detected a soft "kerthumpakerthumpakerthumpa" noise coming from the bathroom. Upon investigation I found that a nearly full roll of toilet paper was cheerfully unspooling itself into a neat little pile onto the bathroom floor.

...how does that even happen? I blame one of Kidzilla's invisible cats.

WEEELLLP that ain't getting unstuck from my head anytime soon. Especially since cell23 is now singing it in the other room.

Thanksgiving day

• Was up at eight to bake loaf 2 of pumpkin bread and to make breakfast before turning into a parade zombie for three hours and then running out the door. Managed to do all of it and my butt was on the couch with a plate of pancakes and a mug of coffee precisely at 9am.
  
  
• Watched the parade. If you read my tweets from the 25th you'll know that I completely FAILED to resist the temptation to livetweet the last 2/3rds of it, but there was so much to squee and snark upon this year.
  
  Two special things of note: This year's Rockette tallies - 1 Asian, 2 Black, and one Latina girl this year, all shoved to the back of formations while the blondes got to be in front. Also I feel the need to mention this guy, his outfit (it looks like the Grinch, Flavor Flav, a Muppet and the NBC peacock had a bastard furbaby), his scary balloons, and the fact that I realized last night that he's the same guy who did this particular $15M statue (not safe for work OR life). *dot dot dot* well, at least he looked both warm and like he was having the time of his life, but I'm still kinda surprised (in a sort of good way) that they let a guy who sold a life size hentai statue of a boy wielding a cum lasso design (creepy cute) balloons for the parade. Either that or Macy's parade committee hasn't figured out how to google yet. Still, oh, Japan.
  
  
• I joined cell23's extended family for Thanksgiving, much to everyone's apparent delight. We met up with the kids there, pictures were taken, whack a mole was played, and I discovered that Kidzilla likes to giggle over silly pictures of her father as much as I and her grandmother do. Dinner at cell23's grandparents was delicious. I failed to weigh in on the Great Stuffing Debate. I liked both of them, sorry boys. The pumpkin bread I brought seemed to be a hit, and there was pie and the carrot cake cell23's mom made for my belated birthday. So NOM NOM NOM. We also had an entertaining round of Apples to Apples which Kidzilla did quite well in despite us playing the grown-up version... this led to some hilariously awkward moments.

Black Friday

Y'all saw the pictures. Fuck your Black Friday.

Saturday

Other than the movie and poop debacle at the end if the night, lol, Saturday was kind of an easygoing, visit-the-other-grandparents kind of day, which we did - we spent a quiet afternoon over at the Geoffroys (and had another Thanksgiving dinner/lunch that couldn't be beat). Shortly after we arrived home The Internet pounded on our door baying for cell23; he later spent a little time hanging with them while me and the kids had movie night (ha ha ha ha ha). After they got put to bed, lysscat pinged me asking if she could escape The Internet's invasion of her house, so she came over and we chilled and bitched and ate leftover pumpkin bread. I need to hang out with her more often. :)

After cell23 came back, Lovebug woke up wanting a glass of water. Not sure what happened then but cell23 ended up bringing him into our room to fall back asleep; I spent the night being adorably snored at and snuggled by both of them. *squee*

Sunday

• Dragged myself out of bed at ass-o'clock for bell rehearsal at 8:45 and got a warm welcome back from everyone. I guess they missed me! We played some kinda expansion on "Hark the Herald Angels Sing" which came out quite nice and I hummed carols on the quick drive home.
  
  
• Which was just as well because LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, TIS THE SEASON FOR ALL DAY CHRISTMAS CAROLS ON THE RADIO.
  
  
• oh my god you guys, so to celebrate (and catch up!) with cell23's, aliwings', and my birthdays, cell23's family treated us to buffet brunch at this place. Yes, go look at the menu, I'll wait.
  
  Done? Yeah. I ate myself SILLY to the point of actually being too full to breathe properly. Don't care it was DELICIOUS. And then there were birthday cards, presents (belated birthday money and the last two books in Scott Pilgrim for the win) and these individual chocolate cakes that were so rich that once we cut up enough to let everyone have a slice there was still a cake and a half that went home with us afterwards. oooof. So yeah that happened.
  
  ALSO SO MANY DUCKS. I should have brought that end of a stale loaf with me. Though I imagine those ducks are fat enough from all the kids feeding them.
  
  
• After taking the kiddos boot shopping with Grandma, cell23 and I drove them home, came back and hung out at deliriumdeva's and renegadethumper's for a bit and watched their cat valiantly try to eat their Christmas tree. We returned to find we had no internet. OH NOES. After doing the usual swearing and router cycling and cable jiggling and checking if the TV still worked (it did) we gave up and tried to piggyback one of the networks in the general vicinity... to find that they weren't connected either. So I wandered over to verbena76's and aersi's to confirm that yes indeed, pretty much everyone we knew had lost their internet. I'm honestly surprised that the outcry of deprived nerds wasn't louder. *shakes fist* COMCAST. Apparently they had a DNS server fail that took out a good chunk of their East Coast customers. O_o Wow. FAIL.

Anyway. That was my weekend. Now I feel all caught up in LJ (publicly, anyway, lol). Time to go catch up in other departments.